Crypto Bros Purchase Island Nation, Collapse Government in Record 72 Hours

MIAMI — A consortium of cryptocurrency billionaires purchased the Pacific island nation of Tavulea on Tuesday to establish a blockchain-based libertarian paradise. The government collapsed by Friday. "We all agreed the old system is broken," explained co-founder Chad Ledger from his rented yacht. "Kyle wants proof-of-stake voting. Braden insists on a DAO-based judiciary. And someone named @CryptoViking69 keeps proposing trial by combat." The island's 300 residents expressed relief. "They offered us forty million dollars in a currency that lost half its value during the sales pitch," said village elder Tui Manu. At press time, the consortium had pivoted to a floating city, which maritime engineers say will sink both literally and financially within one fiscal quarter.